Children

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

What's done to children, they will do to society.


If a child annoys you, quiet him by brushing his hair. If this doesn't
work, use the other side of the brush on the other end of the child.


FORTUNE REMEMBERS THE GREAT MOTHERS: #6
"Johnny, if you fall and break your leg, don't come running to me!"
-- Mrs. Emily Barstow, June 16, 1954

fortune cookie

That's the thing about people who think they hate computers. What they
really hate is lousy programmers.
- Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle in "Oath of Fealty"

"A Baby's Bill of Rights"

Article the Third:
Where a crime of the kidneys has been committed, the accused should
enjoy the right to a speedy diaper change. Public announcements and
guided tours of the aforementioned are not necessary.

Article the Fourth:
The decision to eat strained lamb or not should be with the "feedee"
and not the "feeder". Blowing the strained lamb into the feeder's
face should be accepted as an opinion, not as a declaration of war.

Article the Fifth:
Babies should enjoy the freedom to vocalize, whether it be in church,
a public meeting place, during a movie, or after hours when the
lights are out. They have not yet learned that joy and laughter have
to last a lifetime and must be conserved.

-- Erma Bombeck, "A Baby's Bill of Rights"

fortune cookie

Because we don't think about future generations, they will never forget us.
-- Henrik Tikkanen

More From Church Bulletins:

Potluck supper: prayer and medication to follow.

From Church Bulletins:

The Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.